At last! In truth, Mark lifted it from the loft. I put the lights on and Ellie decorated 98% of it (2% was me shifting a few things around - my OCD told me to remove bigger baubles from the top ....but not actually re-arrange.... per se). She had the time of her life, its the first time she has actually wanted to do it. But maybe she was channelling me inner procrastination over the matter.
I was sorting through photos the other day and came across this beauty, again. Its one of my favourite pictures from Ellie's younger years. Her face? My face? The joy? It just fills me with tears.
I was going through a pretty tough time, emotionally, then. But for that party, I braced myself and smoothed down my frock and got on with it - like you do.
Rather like I am doing today.
I'm being brave. I don't want to be but you do - don't you? To do what you think is the right thing when you know its killing you and really it's not. That's what we do best - let the other party feel as if absolutely everything is ok.
Excuse me whilst I sob.
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