Ladies Camera Club

13 Jan 2011

The most wonderful girl

That's my Belle.
I say "my", obv I mine "our". But during the day she is mine, for me to smother with gentleness and caring. Ohhhhh, I could literally squeeze the life out of her when I hug you ever feel like that? You love someone so, so much that you could just squidge them to death? Well, not really death but.....oh I don't know how to describe it at such a late hour.

Yesterday she started at a new school. Every Tuesday she will spend the day at a special needs school to improve her life skills and personal development amongst kids that work at her pace and ability. I was anxious getting her ready and warned her that the kids in this school look/talk/act different with varying emotions and personalities not quite like her peers at secondary school. Basically I didn't want her to think "where the hell have you taken me, Momma?" Forewarned is forearmed, you know.

We arrived on time and I hung around to ask the new teacher what time I had to collect her only the new teacher was quite keen to show us around, including Elle's assistant who has followed her from her secondary school. The school is fully equipped with thousands of contraptions and rooms and technology to deal with children of varying abilities but what I thought I was prepared for, took me by suprise. I knew I'd see poor kiddies who would be severely mentally and physically ill; I knew what to expect but it still broke my heart. I can't tell you how hard it was to withhold my tears. I think what help me stay composed was how smiley and happy everyone was. At Ellie's normal school, you see kids with serious attitudes - varying from gentle quiet kids to full on cockiness and pushing each other on the road. But these kids - all they know is to be happy and be made to feel happy. If only in a perfect world, hey?

Ellie trundled along the rooms and corridors, taking it all in but I couldn't gauge her feelings and I didn't want to ask infront of the teachers. I left to go home 30 minutes later and sat in my car, drove out the gates, pulled over in a lay by and broke down in tears. A combination of anxiety, worry and wondering "what the hell have we allowed to happen, here?" But I got a grip and felt good again that realising that I hadn't left her in tears or with a bunch of monsters. Those 6 hours didn't half drag but come home time, I popped into the school to collect her surrounded by all the assistants of the whole school. And there she was, star pupil all happy and giggly. Her first words were "Mum, I went to pamper club at lunch time and had a foot and back massage". Sold to the worrying momma and sold to the kid who loves being pampered! As we walked back to the car, she yapped on about learning about money (she still struggles with counting the right money and change) and healthy living. Not once did she say "this kid did this or this kid has that or this kid does funny things". For once, in her whole life, she was the kid that wasn't different. And that has been a bloody long time coming.

Here is a little short I did using my treasured iPhone whilst she was still in gleeful mode:

Today she started her floristry course at a special needs college in a nearing town. THIS was the thing we both had great visions of. Plus Ellie got to wear normal clothes and not uniform. She chose her "Team Edward" Tee over a long sleeved long tee, comfy velour trackies and her beloved boots. She was as comfy as comfy can be. The taxi that was to collect her didn't arrive so we spent an hour organising a new one which meant she would be late on her first day. The school and college were so good about this. And then the nail biting 6 hours of "wondering" ensued until she came home. I got a knock at the door at 3pm with an assistant helping her through. The first thing I spotted was a corsage on her coat. I knew it was one of her creations and I squealed with delight. Her face was a picture and a half when she said "this is for you". A lovely, traditional "button hole" of two creamy carnations, wired and taped intricately with green foliage and a pretty blue ribbon bow. She said it was tricky to make and took her ages but overall, she liked the course because she got a hot chocolate at break time. Sniff, sniff. I admired it for a good while as she regaled her day in blow by blow detail. And she has a new friend (Ellie takes a while to make friends - very particular is my girl, you know ;)). Her name is Jasmine. Well, it was Jasmine this and Jasmine that for a while before she went on to explain that lunchtime is COOL. Cos they have sofas to sit on. Well if you knew Ellie, she is all out comfort and sofas in a canteen is like, well - MAJOR!

Its back to her regular schooly-looly tomorrow where she will be able to share with Amy and Bethany (her BFF's) all about her adventures. I can see a change in her already and I think that's a renewed confidence but most of all I think she is just what most special kids are - happy.

And finally, for today....look what I got. Postmarked Buckingham Palace with contents from St James Palace. My heart skipped a beat when I read the post mark. Was it a summons to the Tower of London for a beheading? Was Kate going to ask me to design her wedding dress or perhaps invites? Did she want Belles for a bridesmaid or borrow a pair of my new diamond earrings that Mark bought me for crimbo? Hmmmm?

I opened it as not to rip the envelope because whatever the contents, this envelope was always going to be treasured no matter what. Honest, I was trembling when I opened it and read the letter carefully and smiled. My head is staying on these shoulders after all. Albeit a very big one ;)


Bettyann said...

What a lovely school happenings at your home. So glad that Elle is now belle of the ball, so to speak !!! Must make you so very happy at the change..lovely corsage by a lovely darling..oh my sono off with her head...hmmmm do tell us !!!!!!

Miss Natz said...

I am soso happy that your girlie had such a great time at her new school and college, this is great!

And am intrigued about the Queen.... oooh!

Mandi said...

Awww what a wonderful blog post
~Thank you for sharing with us

And as for the envelope!! wow

Stay happy and I hope Belle continues to be as happy as ever!
xx said...

Hi Kirsty - great news about Ellie and schools - her attitude us brilliant and she is so going to make a happy success of her life despite everything !! You and Mark must be very proud of her - I would be ! Caron xxxx

Sam said...

SOOOO chuffed for Ellie, she is a star, sounds like the two schools are just the ticket, she is getting the best of 3 worlds now - hurrah!!!

DO TELL about the contents of the envelope!!

Jen said...

OOh you tease!! Do tell :) And oh Belle, I'm SO happy for her. She sounds like she's finding her way in the world.

Sharon said...

Oh my god, you haven't got a Golden ticket to the wedding have you? So pleased to hear about Ellie's new schools and that she is enjoying them!

Fiona said...

Oh no Kirsty, you can't leave us in suspenders like that!
How fab that Ellie said she didn't want to leave her new school. Hope she loves her floristry and that you'll be showing us her creations, (I also do a bit of flower arranging.)
I bet you are so proud of her.

Lisa Hemmings said...

So pleased Ellie had a lovely day.
Nice to see a happy post!

And the envelope? well.... tell us more... please? xx

Sharon s said...

What marvellous news about Ellie. So glad that she's enjoyed herself so much. You must be so proud of her. Think her creative skills gained from her talented mother will now rise and she'll have so much fun. Wishing her lots of love and happiness for her new challenges.

And envelope.... It's cruel to keep us in suspense... x x x

Hope you're looking forward to your 40th - must nip up for a brew and help you celebrate. With love, Sharon x x x

SDCrafts said...

TBH I don't know what to write because I am overwhelmed with sheer gratitude that you were able to write this; that Belle is so happy; that life does have it's rewards; that this has been so loonng coming, it is even more HUGE than you could have ever dreamed.

Bless you Kirsty!

Anonymous said...

SO pleased for beautiful Ellie!!
Can't wait to see more of her flower creations in the future!

Hmmmmm, does the Palace wat help with the wedding invites perhaps?

Anonymous said...

brilliant. Why cant she go to the other school all the time? She needs the care and support so why put her through the horrors of a school not equipped to help her? Wonder what is wrong with our education system nowadays..poor kid she must be thrilled to have the care she needs at a level she can cope with.

Jenna Upson said...

you can't leave us in royal suspense! lol

How amazing that Belle had a great time. it always me when our own Children have the ability to be stronger than us. Hope the school is all that you want it to be for her x x x

sandysewin said...

Loved your story about Elle. I think you both are very special.


Leave us hanging, sheesh . . .

Sue said...

So glad Belle enjoyed her new schools. I hope her confidence soars.

Now what was in that envelope???

Rosie (Freycob) said...

Go Elles! I bet they loved you in the new schools as much as you loved being there. Can't wait to hear more about them both and see how you're getting on with your beautiful flower creations.

Now as for your mother.... what's in the env chickadee? Am being very nosey! x

*reyanna klein* said...

I sat and smiled the WHOLE time I read this. I'm SO happy for Belle and so proud of her too! YAY! This is just such wonderful news. :-)

And cool envelope! What WAS in it? LOL. Let's chat soon! :-D

*reyanna klein* said...

p.s. When we chat, you can see my belly! LOL. :-p

pigglet said...

soo pleased that the new school and college were such a success for the first day. i am sure it will continue. i work in a special school and all of our children are looked after with our hearts as well as our brains good job cos my brains arnt worth nought lol !! i am looking forward to hearing all about how she gets on.

Kelly said...

My eyes teared up reading this post Kirsty. I am so so happy for Ellie.

And what's with the envelope - hmmmm?

Ruth said...

well, well, well. Looks like we have ourselves a floral designer in the making. Great Job, Elles Belles!!!! I can't wait to see more pictures of her creations. Keep up the fabulous work! Love, Scott, Ruth, Sara, Jeff, Kris, Betina, Daisy, Rusty, and Charlie

Heather said...

Kirsty you had me filling up! Bless Belle & her beautiful day & bless you for being her Mum & telling us all about it. Because we care very much you know - even complete strangers who only know you through your blog :)
I cant wait till you reveal the secret contents of The Envelope. How exciting!! xx

Di said...

Hi Kirsty!

I welled up like some others when I read this wonderfully positive post. Am totally thrilled for Elle, you and Mark!

BUT, if you don't reveal contents of said letter I shall be on my way up to shake it outta you! Only joking!

Hugs, Di x

Alana said...

What a lovely post and a great start for Belles in 2011. It was so uplifting to her of her acceptance and delight of her fist days at her new schools. Wishing lots more happiness and that Belle continues to blossom in 2011.

And do tell about your letter....

manicstamper said...

How lovely to hear about Elle's new school/college and to know that she had a fab time. Beautiful corsage.....ha maybe BP want Elle to do the wedding flowers eh...ha ha ha!!!