Tonight, my darling girl and I were solving word searches. They are Ellie's favourite puzzle. We discuss the words and how close some of the words seem to the real searches in the puzzle. We whine and moan at how tricky they are at times but all the same we have a real laugh and giggle about it. We dissect words she doesn't understand and in turn she delights in explaining what she does know; when she can.
I left her to it whilst I prepared our favourite sticky licky chicken dish for dinner. We had an endless amount of chicken to get through as there was a dinner cancellation which meant we could over indulge in honey and lemony chicks. I kept an eye on her to how she was getting on and couldn't help but grab my camera to take this short run of photos.
I am in love with them. They are her, pure Ellie....my little love on a stick.
Do you like her new glasses? (Thanks Reyanna, for reminding me to get pics of them). She got them just before crimbly and I think they make her look fabulous. She chose them herself which is a rarity and are actually a dark pink although you obv can't tell!
Im glad they make her look a little bit older because, as you know, I worry worry worry. I wish I could not worry and I wish I could pretend that I don't mind and care about her physique/issues. I wish I could get anyone, someone - even everyone to sit and listen to how much I fret about her and her issues and how people perceive them and me. Believe it or not, I very rarely get the opportunity to vent that to anyone who can give me the 10 minutes or so that I need. That is the gods honest truth. That's because when a problem is not your own, listening to others stories and tales are nothing but empty words that you can gloss over with the brilliance of your own magnificent lives.
But life, to us, is not a competition.
To us its survival and gasping for air and full of hope and want and neediness and stomach churning moments of "is that it?" every 6 months or so. You see the look of pity or horror from outsiders (even those within your inner circle) and struggle to contain the motherly instinct of protecting your child with a force so strong that even a slight glare could kill. But I do maintain it and I admit I allow myself to let it bubble and brew within my chest cavity until I can't bear it no more and then blurt it out on here. So here I am, blurting!
Then I look at these photos and I think - "wow, nobody would know anything different about you from these photos unless I explain your age or your issues". And isn't that a gorgeous thing? I wonder if any new reader of my blog would have the faintest idea? Not caring, actch. Im revelling in my relief at how proud I am of myself and HER!
I loved these photos so much I scrapped them straight away - well, after tea....which was A. Mazing. I have had the Home Front line from Studes for a few weeks and thought I'd match them with these pics.
You see the roses.....thats a muslin fabric, wrapped around to form a rose and dipped in ink. I saw that somewhere and Id love to give the original artist some credit but hello? Can I find it....NO!
Also available from the Studes shop are these babies - Bakers twine wound onto vintage bobbins in lots of yummy colours. I think you will see a lot of bakers twine from other manufacturers at CHA 2010 but remember - you saw them at Studes first
And thrown in for kicks and giggles, one of my angels being lit up by my fairy light twig tree - I couldn't resist this, this evening.
Need sleep, I have lemony chicken repeating on me.....hmmmmm, lemony chicken...... **sigh**