Ladies Camera Club

21 Jun 2007

Im having a strange old week

Feelings very much on the up, feelings a tinsy winsy bit down - mixed feelings all around.
So what do we do about it?
We eat copious amounts of Wenselydale and Cranberry Cheese. Oh yes we jolly well do. Skip, skip, skip to the delicatessan, take a ticket, wait for your number to pop up on the triangle digital display. Ask the counter girl to cut you a veritable wedge of the cow stuff. Not too big and not to little. There, just about right. You watch the wire pierce the truckle of curdled milk. She weighs it - its just the right amount! How do they do that? You pay for it, you go home and you bang it in the fridge until you suffer a feeling. The feeling could be high or it could be low but your body cries out for the lactose fuelled edibleness of mouse trappings. And then comes the gorge. Wafer thin slice, then a crumbly bit and then a chunk leads to the whole wedge.
What?
I can't be preggo.
What is this nonsense?
Munch munch munch until every last crumb and cranberry is working its way throught my intestines to be sorted at the fat/protein/lactose/vitamin department and be equally distributed as cellulite on my butt, thighs, chins and bellies.
BURP. Pardon me. Acid reflux and bile spats the back of my oesophagus.
It was totally worth it.
**waves the "V" peace sign and resorts to bedford with Dr Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz**
Cuckoo. La la.

11 comments:

Lynette said...

OMG you crack me up, although we don't really dine on cranberry cheese in America,, I do LOVE cheese and can feel your pain!!! For me it usually cheese and crackers.. but it all goes to the same place right!!!!!

Nancy P said...

You are hysterical! What a creative writer! I laughed and laughed! I bet it was yummy! [I thought I was the only one that food called out to - "I am here waiting for you, come get me!]

joanna said...

LOL you loon!! Mmmmm, I'd love a nice piece of Wensleydale, Grommit!! Have a lovely weekend, darl - {{{hugs}}} to you all xxx

Anonymous said...

oh I love wensleydale with cranberries. Have you ever been to the factory at Hawes? it is totally worth it.

Darcy.x

JenBreeze said...

Oh, you continue to make me smile!! I hope you awake from your cheese coma feeling refreshed.

Marta said...

Thank you for the( burp) laugh. It (burp) truly made my (burp) day!!!

Anonymous said...

As a fellow cheese lover I know exactly where you're coming from, you must try M&S Cornish Cruncher cheddar with balsamic onions, Oh. My. God. that is the finest cheese to grace this fair isle, I implore you, try it!
Jackie xxx

Scrapbookmomof3 said...

Hmmm....cranberry cheese sounds really good. I have never had it but I may have to fly across and try it.

Sandie said...

That is sooo funny. That is my fave cheese too, but because it leaps on my hips almost immediately I've rationed myself to xmas only. Now after reading this I NEED SOME NOW LOL.

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